I’ve been thinking hard about my creative approach, my art practice, and how I decide my portfolio. Some part came from looking at the Boston Modern Collection currently showcasing at the National Gallery of Singapore. Another part came from collaborating with a Singaporean artist over the past year. It’s led me to think if I’ll ever have that kind of life, one featured in a gallery somewhere. Or where my sketchbooks would be placed on display for people to read and see when I’m dead.
As I searched around, I found a whole load of creative videos on YouTube teaching different creative approaches. For some reason, everyone’s work looked… similar? There’s a certain type or a certain vibe of loose lines and impressionist expressionist type brush strokes, and it’s driving the creative algorithms. While this might not be the actual case, meaning there are a lot of other artists not on YouTube sharing their creative practice, there’s a subtle influence this drives as a whole.
I found myself faced with Simply Draw – a drawing software that uses AI to teach you how to improve your drawings. I’m not using it, but the ads keep coming to me. It made me think: what’s the standard now? Do I have to draw a certain way in order to be considered “drawing well”?
A part of the ad shows a young child drawing Mother’s Day cards, and she draws better over time. There’s a comment on how it would be better to receive nicer looking illustrations. I don’t know I would prefer a better drawing or a creative piece with an authentic attempt. I know the difference from someone training my daughter to draw, vs if my daughter drew on her own. The heart behind the drawing would show easily.
Many times, the creative struggle I personally see is a person who lacks the courage to put themselves completely on the canvas. It’s a “I want to be me, but I want to show you in a way Monet would have”. That lacks authenticity, as much as it is authentic. It’s not what Monet would have done, although Monet did draw his family an awful lot.
And this conclusion gave me a firmer direction, which I talked about with Clarice just now: I might not have my portfolio the same way my friends have, because that’s not me. It doesn’t mean I want to follow everyone else, or that I’m trying to stand out for being novel. But I just want to have my own expression in my own way, and I have to decide if I’m happy with that. In some ways, I have to be happy with that. I don’t have much of a choice, because I’m not that famous after all.
I hope my loved ones see my “bad art” and enjoy it still, because it’s not bad, it’s just my own way of doing it.
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