I am not the most comfortable with sitting somewhere, and waiting for creativity to strike me with some divine inspiration. I am also not the most adept at process work, because whenever I do a process based painting, everything just turns out black at the end of it. I tend to be quite bleak about my outlook on life.
So when I do these types of 100 day writing things, or just aiming for a daily discipline, I enjoy them a lot. It’s nice to just force myself to make something, even if I don’t feel like it.
In the past week I’ve needed to force something out, but nothing is coming out. It’s weirder when I force something out, and I struggle to find the actual shape of it. It’s not a discipline moment, because I don’t have a daily art aim; I have a daily writing aim. So I’ve had to sit there and wait for my inspiration to come.
It was so challenging, and I hated doing it.
It made me think about going back to doing a daily artwork, just for me to be fluent with producing whenever again. But it takes time, and I don’t have the time these days.
That being said, while sharing with a friend today, I realised my perspective on time is something that needs adjusting. I want to change how I view my time because I think I’m just taking everything as a challenge to my time, but not actually making something good from it.
Creating out of something is always needed. I need to create out of an experience, and currently, because of how I view my time, I’m not letting myself have experiences. It’s not beneficial for me creatively, and more so, I don’t give myself a break. That’s not helping.
Anyway, just some creative lull thoughts. I’m making myself not work today, just to experience life a little.
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