trisected

Tag: birthday

  • Celebration Break!

    I was not updating for the past few days because I was happy celebrating my birthday! This breaks my streak, but guess what, who’s really checking? I’m super happy about how I have learnt how to manage my own expectations about myself, including how to tell myself to chill out if I don’t do something I’ve set out to do.

    I mean I have already been able to run the marathon distance. I’ve already read more than 52 books this year. I have been writing consistently for a good amount of time, and now I’m also getting my work properly put together for the coming Singapore Art Book Fair. So it’s all coming along nicely. Just because I missed three days of writing here doesn’t mean the world is going to end. I am okay with that.

    The past few days has been a fun time. I went camping with Clarice and Mark, and my parents crashed for lunch on both days. Wallace came along too. It rained out in the middle of the night, so that was pretty darn fun. It was so pleasantly cooling, but just before the rain, I was sweating buckets through and through.

    When we got home, I spent most of the day playing games actually. Just having a ton of fun. What else would you want to do on your birthday?

    Also, this is the last birthday without a baby. Who knows how the next few years of birthday will be, but I just know it will not be the same. Not that we can’t do the same things we did this year, but it just would be a change for myself to go through. One year at a time ey?

  • Becoming 34

    I never thought I would be 34 years old. I thought being 34 was for like retirees, or the years where people became really boring, stuck in their careers, trying to make life happen the way they thought it should.

    I’m glad to have had so many people in my life in the past year, and it was pretty crazy to see how everything has changed in the past year. Where I live, how I think, and what I hope to do in ministry, all of these have had such a big push.

    In reflection, the last year was a lot of change. 2022 to 2023 gave me a huge personal development. I think I pushed a lot harder in the intentionally creative avenues that I was exploring, and also just really made a lot more effort to talk with people to listen more.

    I’ve also spent a lot more time outside, and just breathing, existing. Learning how to give myself space to think has been very key.

    I’ve been extremely grateful for a lot of people, namely Clarice for giving me a tremendous amount of love and helping me understand myself in so many ways. Gifford’s rushing of my house renovations, Mark and Boren for being friends who listened with no judgement and just was there a ton. For my parents who are living a lot closer now, and their presence helps me in many ways. For my ministry leaders and their autonomy in letting me do what needs to be done, but also for pushing me ahead. It continues to be such a great place to be at, and I can’t see myself working anywhere else.

    Thank God for letting me live every single day. I’m still amazed that I’m not called out of this world just yet.

    One day at a time.

  • 1989

    It’s my birthday, and it’s been 32 years since.

    There’s many ways to think about it, but one of the things I’m really most thankful for today and this time is really how much I’ve been seeing myself grow in the past few years. It’s been extremely reflective this past two years, and I’ve been learning many things about myself, and the things and events that have made me who I am today.

    I’ve always thought of my current age as a comparison against all the other people who became famous at my current age. Like when I was in my twenties, I thought about how Taylor Swift was so famous and doing so many things. I thought about the Christian writer Joshua Harris and how he started out writing by then already. Of course, we wouldn’t necessarily say that life was so so much better for them, but I was still kinda envious.

    I still think that now, and it’s one of the things that motivate me to keep on at what I do. I still think that I wish I had that world wide level of fame. I don’t say it much, but it’s something I do consider.

    But in the past few years, I’ve understood a different kind of life set out for me. Maybe I might not be that famous person who has changed the world. I’ve seen that I’ve changed the lives of the people around me, in little bits, or in large parts. I’ve seen that I’m a friend, and that I’m not necessarily the star, but these aren’t bad parts at all. Maybe they’re actually the even bigger parts.

    I don’t have to wish for fame anymore, because just being me, I’m kinda famous already. My friends all know me, and that’s fame enough. Might sound like a compromise, but I am truly happy for all the friends that I’ve gotten to know over my 32 years. Some longer than others, but I am thankful for all of them. They are the best people in the world, that fame will never understand. My friends are so directly important and precious to me, that I will really miss their presence if it were taken away.

    So even though I still think about what world impact I could do and change, I still know that at the end of the day, I’ve already achieved that. I know that I have close friends that love and cherish me for all that I am. I am super thankful for that, and I’m glad I don’t have to think if they’re here for my money or my fame in itself, but they’re just here for me. That’s awesome.

    I’ll be here for them too. Or there for them. I’ll be with them. Because I know that all of it matters, and it’s been really an amazing journey with all of them.

    The most of all being Clarice, who has really changed me in the biggest ways. At 32, other than my parents, I don’t know anyone else more loving to me than she is.

    Maybe one day this will be a speech, but a speech for my friends, who have stood by me all this time. They’re the best, and I really wish I had more time to write these things, but I’m off to spend more time with my family, and friends too.

    What a life I’ve gotten to live. I am so thankful to God for carrying me through all this, and to all the friends He has given me. So so so so so thankful.