Yesterday’s Deepvali break was very real. I enjoyed the rest at home, and especially spending time with Clarice the night before. It’s moments like these that remind me to cherish the random days and nights, where we could have a plan-less day, because baby still isn’t here yet.
Today was a great day, because we had the morning to work together. Technically I worked a lot earlier, and by the time Clarice got up, I had done 60% of my work for the day. The other 40% involved calls and meeting people, so it was pretty much good to go.
I had a meeting with a daughter of a friend, of whom is now my friend too, I think. We had a good time talking about art, and honestly there’s a lot more to hear about her and her art scene. There are so many things to talk in detail with other artists, and it always feels like there’s never enough time.
After printing some stuff with her, I sat down to reflect on some things, and I was really emotional. I reflected on the war, and on the way we live in Singapore, in the midst of the world on fire. There are many things I don’t understand, and one of the deepest things I don’t understand is how we don’t really care much for anyone else but ourselves in Singapore. I feel that for myself too; I can easily forget there are other people with their own lives in the world, and just want to have my life perfect. But my time of reflection really made me feel so sad and small inside. What kind of person thinks that they are the most important in the world, and that they deserve praise and honor? We’re all really horrible people, and the more someone demands respect, the less likely they are to get it. And yet, in the modern day, everyone is asking to be respected for themselves, their rights, and everything with it.
I don’t deserve any, because I think I have also asked to be respected for my rights and my actions. Therefore, my own logic on myself, I should not be.
This philosophical musing went on for some time, and it’s still lingering somewhere in my head and heart.
I had a burrito for dinner, with the attempts of weighing things down with some Tex Mex, but here we are, still writing about the feelings on the day. My personal small treat for myself was a bottle of Perrier. A green bottle of sparkly water would be a treat. And there are people still dying of thirst somewhere else in the world.
Sometimes I really wonder where my brain goes to when I start writing these things.
Anyway, the day hasn’t ended, but I might not remember to write later tonight. So here’s my thoughts for today, raw, unfiltered, and still very confused.
Please don’t take me too seriously.
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