Dear Bro,
I was checking back in my texts about the last time we texted about anything, and I realised it was in 2023. I can’t believe so much time has passed since, and more than that, I am sorry that I wasn’t around more often.
I know whenever things like this happen, the first thing to do is to regret all the things that could be done to try and save you. But the fact of it is that we didn’t keep in touch like we said we would. I wish I did, but I didn’t. I am sorry.
I wish I knew why you did it. I won’t find out, not in my current lifetime at least. I wish you knew how I had hoped to see you grow up some more, into a young adult life, and then we would have a different set of things to talk about then. I really had hoped to see you more and more.
I will miss you, even though we haven’t talked much since. You were always a great person to catch around church, or to just bump into. I knew that if I found you anywhere, I would not walk away sad.
I wish I knew what burdens you were carrying. Maybe I might not have told you the best answer on how to deal with it, but I just wished I knew something. This is the frustrating part, where I don’t know the end to the story, because it’s just not my part to know. It’s yours, and I know whatever it was, you made enough peace with it to take your life. It is so hard to take that as the final answer, but for now that’s the final answer I/we will ever have from you.
I pray so much, that God is with you, and you are safe in his hands. Whatever my theology might be, I just hope and pray that you’re in his hands. That’s the only safe place to be, anywhere in the universe.
I’ll miss you buddy. I really will. You are a good dude.
I will see your physical body on Saturday, but I will always remember you and your smile. Always.
I really wish you didn’t do what you did, but you did. And I just… I wish I shared my hope for life more with you. I can’t do that now, but I really wish I did.
Rest In Peace Jon. You were really loved. I really hope you knew that.
You were really loved.