trisected

Tag: writing

  • Getting back onto writing

    It’s been some time since I’ve posted anything here, or anywhere else for that matter. I’ve been active running the Through The Roof programs, and in the range of work I do, I’ve been feeling my writing here is better suited for my journals. So I have been writing in my journals a lot more, and nothing really comes up here.

    But it doesn’t mean I don’t miss writing here. I think it was definitely enjoyable. I missed feeling free about what I was writing, until I started to get more people visiting the site, then I felt shy again. It’s strange because if you were going to meet me in real life, you might not think me shy at all. The difference being it would be in real life, and we would have a good exchange of words and stories. But this site, blog, post, it’s all open for everyone and I have no idea who really reads it. I just assume you read because you’re interested in my life in some way or form.

    In any case, I whipped my keyboards out once more, and got myself a fun setup to start working on.

    I’ve also started to look at Obsidian closer, if it would be a better non-distraction writing tool. It isn’t really, I think I hit the best one early in life, and it’s iA writer. It’s just the best and most appropriate pure words writing app. I hope they never change.

    On top of all of this, I started to turn on my old phones. Talking about phones like the iPhone SE2020, or my 17 year old Palm Treo that my dad passed to me when I was 17. It was a real trip trying to turn these things on again, and to start planning workflows around it.

    But was it the same as just writing? Nope. In fact, I think since putting this keyboard together an hour ago has been the most motivated I’ve felt in writing for the past 6 months. More than that, writing on this blog, with this stale layout comes the closest to what I feel writing on iA writer. Maybe I would change the font, just to match the experience exactly. It’s quite therapeutic to see the work finalised in that very technical looking font. It suits my writing brain.

    I’ll update about creativity here again soon. I’ll be needing to share about creativity as a whole some time soon, but I think as a comeback post, this is pretty okay.

    For the keyboard nerds, if there any left, this is my set up

    • Prime E RGB PCB
    • Prime E Frosted Case
    • Tropical Switches by Bolsa Supply
    • Cerakey Crazed Keycaps

    and this is what it looks like

  • Writing devices

    I’ve been having a conversation with a good friend about writing devices. I think I talked about this awhile back, but the conversations are still going on.

    It’s been making me wonder, what is it about writing that I’m avoiding, that I think will be solved by buying a new device? Is it the fear of actually starting to write? Or maybe it’s the lack of inspiration, or a lack of a subject and topic.

    I think it might be the fear of actually producing something. I know my friend has no issue with that, she has a full site and publishing thing going on now. But for me, I think I’m afraid of what I would need to do if I start writing. I’m afraid of doing more work, and I’m afraid of the successes of doing well in writing. It’s not what I’m known for, and I guess it takes a lot of effort to start meeting the “writing crowd”. I’ve already committed much time and effort into the art groups and I don’t know the writing guys in Singapore.

    But that’s not why you write, right?

    And that might be my slow struggle. I don’t know how to “be successful in writing”. I don’t know what that looks like, or how it feels. There are too many unknowns.

    If I can sort out how I am thinking and feeling about these things, perhaps I would be able to get myself going better in my writing. Not really going better, but to just get more confident, and to actually start writing properly. In a way that I would aim to be published somehow.

    One post at a time I guess.

  • Trying to type with a very old and ancient keyboard

    I had read somewhere that the writers of old had really appreciated the pen, in the way that the speed of writing would play as a speed limit for an author’s thoughts. At that time, it was also thought that the typewriter would kill the author’s writing processes, and yet we progressed further to the computer. However, I am now writing on an extremely old keyboard, and my thoughts are only travelling as fast as my keyboard speed can go.

    The shift key does not work well, the enter key needs a lot of pushing. Basically, all the keys have some level of annoying press that I need to push through, before it decides to agree with me.

    I find the irony of writing in this process, as an artistic expression of one’s own approach to life – we intentionally go through the most difficult things, in order to have some sense of achievement from it. The keyboard enthusiast in me is screaming, in joy for the chance to type on such an old device, and in functional pain, from trouble of pressing repeatedly so many times to type things out.

    I will need to deep clean this board soon, to get a bit more consistency in function. Otherwise, my attempt at slowing my thoughts down will lead to just outright frustration all the day long.

  • Sleepy Sunday

    I actually slept in past 10AM today. In a normal day, I would usually be up and about by 8AM, with cup of coffee and daily journal in hand.

    But there was something very soothing in today’s morning sleep. It felt like I had some interruptions in sleep, I do remember getting up to go pee every now and then. And yet, my sleep was good. There was a good sense of rest and relaxation, and it felt like the world was wrapping me up in dreams and just the softness of the bed.

    After waking, I remained in a horizontal position for awhile more, and decided to finish up the book that I was reading. Equal Rites by Terry Pratchett, as part of the Discworld Series. It was nice to finish a book, a thoroughly funny and nonsensical one, within a realm of fantasy that understood its place in modern times.

    It always leads me to ask myself. If I started writing a book today, what would I write on? What interests me the most to start writing about it, or what do I feel creatively about to have a story written? I think having themed words are fun for many people to get started, but sometimes the simplicity of daily life is sometimes enough for me to think about life too.

    I like Haruki Murakami for his slice of life that’s somewhat spooky. I enjoy that twist. I also like the straightforwardness of some academic writing, or the self help books. Perhaps that’s the right direction that I should take. Self help for the idealist in modern times.

    In any case, it’s early, and I’m sleepy already, so goodnight world.

  • Free

    There was a time when I was considering writing as a side gig, like maybe a possible thing that I could get into. Not so much income, but just another skillet to develop for possible business? Like for fun, the same way I do drawings and things like that. That thought was put through the reins when I was writing a lot on Medium, because I thought that would be a good place where I could get random people to read my posts, and I could get some side money from it. Either that or I could maybe just curate myself better on the go.

    Also at that time, this site was in a huge question mark. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with this, and it just felt like I was holding the website for the sake of it. WordPress’ layouts were also kinda boring then. I mean now that I’m here, it’s clear that I can deal with this, but it’s not perfect either, but at least it’s somewhere.

    But over time, I realized I didn’t like writing with other writers on Medium. It felt like I couldn’t really express myself as me, and I had to form myself into a shape that others could understand, something like YouTube. The content needs to be what the rest would be willing to watch.

    That’s not me. I’m not really good with dealing with everyone else. I can do work, and I can be friends with people, but having to write creatively for someone else is not something I enjoyed. I found that I also don’t know how to feel about taking drawing commissions to be honest. It felt like there were things that I didn’t want to do, but I had to make do.

    But because of that, I realized I like writing here, for myself. I honestly don’t care too much if people read it or not, the same way when I had written for others when I was younger, I wrote specifically expressing myself to them. It was good, and I really enjoyed it. It was who I was, and what I wanted to be.

    So now back to this particular site, and for me to write as freely as I would want to, it makes me happy. I am very happy with it indeed. I wish there were more ways for me to express it, but time will tell. I will continue to write here often, and I will continue to share what I learn about myself in this whole time.

    If you’re here and this is the first thing you’re getting to read, please just have fun and see where my mind has been on this site. It’s just a peak, but I promise I’ll explain more about how I think in the time to come.

    All that being said, I’m really keen on having my keyboard that I’m typing with to sound and feel a certain way. But apparently it’ll just be time that will get me there. That’s tough, because I’m honestly not the most patient person in the world. Also because of that, I feel like I might want to get another keyboard just to wear in now, before I want to use it later on as well.

    I really get into way too many hobbies interests that take too much of my time, and I really don’t have that much time. Time to get started again.

    https://youtu.be/XOnCffYzGXo this is the sound of said keyboard. My own video of this will be coming up here real soon. 🙂