I found out today that I have a fear of blood.
This is not something that I knew about before. Strangely enough, I sense fear when I see bullets or needles. But never before for blood, or at least not to my knowledge.
So what happened today was that I had sliced my finger at home, on a rusty broom that broke apart while I was using it. Then I placed a lot of pressure on it to stop it from bleeding, wrapped it up and went to the doctors to get it sorted out. At the docs, the doctor needed to unwrap the dressing I did, and clean the wound. As I watched him do this, I started to feel faint, and it took me a good moment or two before I said, I’m blacking out. The world was spinning, it was hard for me to breathe, I couldn’t hear things, and my hands were unable to move. They were clenched, frozen. I couldn’t see anymore, and it was just so bad.
I heard the doctor asking me questions, and I thought I was answering them, but I realised that he wasn’t talking to me later. There were so many things that were just fading in and out, I couldn’t hear, there was no sense of time. It was so crazy.
Anyway, so I have no emotional registered sense of fear. But my body rejects it, or even my mind I guess. I’m still feeling mad queasy, and it’s been a good two to three hours since that. Not cool, but at the same time, I think that it’s really good to learn this about myself.
I’ll share more stories of my blood fears later, especially in reflecting of this fear with the past experiences passing out. lol.